comment

  • President promises penguins

    Steve WoodsOddities, Politics, Social Media

    The disgraced 45th and current disgraceful 47th President of the United States, adjudicated sexual predator, condemned business fraudster, convicted felon and compulsive liar, one Donald John Trump (who is on a personal quest to Make America Grate Again or something similar. Ed.), has never been renowned for his intellectual prowess. This, plus his overweening narcissism, means that for his second spell of squatting in the Oval Office, he has surrounded himself with sycophantic staff who will not embarrass him mainly because they are just as stupid as their boss, if not more so.

    This stupidity was again on display yesterday on the White House social media accounts, with a post based on the lonely penguin meme from the Werner Herzog film Encounters at the End of the World. The meme features footage of a lone Adélie penguin wandering away from its colony in Antarctica and was posted in connection with the Tangerine Tyrant’s obsession with acquiring Greenland from Denmark, an ambition which has provoked both a consumer boycott (posts passim) and demonstrations in both Denmark itself and Greenland.

    Here’s what White House staffers embarrassed themselves and the entire Trump regime with yesterday.

    Under the caption embrace the penguin' a penguin carrying a US flag walks hand in hand with Donald Trump across a snowy mountainous landscape with a red and white Greenland flag on the left flank of the mountains

    It goes without saying that the post attracted extensive mockery online.

    However, this criticism overlooks one vital fact; The Donald’s importing of penguins to Greenland is a far better use of US tax dollars than towing Greenland down to the southern polar region to enable it to be populated by penguins! 😀

  • Danish shoppers get app to help them avoid US products

    Steve WoodsPolitics, Tech

    German news website heise.de reports that a new app is available for Danish consumers to help avoid buying US consumer products in the wake of the efforts of the disgraced 45th President and disgraceful current 45th President of the United States, adjudicated sexual predator, condemned business fraudster, convicted felon and compulsive liar, one Donald John Trump (who is on a personal quest to Make America Grate Again or something similar. Ed.), to acquire the autonomous Danish territory of Greenland on spurious national security grounds.

    A wave of protest in Denmark gave rise to a Facebook group “Boycott goods from the USA“, in which some 100,000 Danes exchange ideas about how best to avoid American products. To put its membership into perspective, Denmark has around six million inhabitants.

    Although it is only available at present for Apple phones, an Android version is promised for the near future.

    Screenshot of UdenUSA app on phone
    Is it American? Get the answer in seconds

    According to the app store blurb:

    UdenUSA helps you identify and avoid American products in your everyday life. With our intuitive scanning function, you can easily check whether a product is American-owned and find Danish alternatives.

    Furthermore, app developer Pipper told the DPA press agency: “We noticed that it was important for many people to avoid food from the USA. But it’s not always so easy to recognise them in the supermarket.“

    The app is provided in two versions – a free version which allows users to scan 2-5 products per day and a subscription version for bulk purchases, which costs DKr. 19.00 per month.

    The developer’s website also pointedly asks visitors ‘Are you supporting Trump when you shop?

    The Irish Times also points out that the app is not without a few geeky touches. Users who scan a product using their camera phone are then confronted with the message: “Now hacking into the Pentagon … no, wait, don’t worry.“

  • Security and wearable animals

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Oddities, Security, Social Media

    A number of years ago, wearable technology looked set to become all the rage.

    Mention of it has declined noticeably in recent years. When, for instance, was the last time you heard of or encountered, say, Google Glass?

    On the other hand, wearable animals – or parts of animals – have a history that extends back into prehistory, in particular that epoch known as the Palaeolithic, the longest period in human history.

    Nevertheless, the manners in which animals or their parts have been used have adapted over the millennia in response to technological changes and development.

    A recent example of such an adaptation is shown below. It cropped up in your correspondent’s social media timeline today, although a reverse image search indicates it might have originated a couple of years ago.

    Social media post reads Please ensure you have your identity badger at all times. Below is a photo of a notice worded Security notice - All Employees Must Wear ID Badgers When Entering
    Why Is The First Letter of Each Word Capitalised?

    Are other identity animals available? Comment below.

  • A few corrections from Merriam Webster

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Social Media

    Shamelessly lifted from social media, Merriam-Webster is making an effort to remedy the modern vicious circle (not cycle. Ed.) of misquoted adages.

    Post reads This is coming from a place of love andnsupport, but... It’s ‘shoo-in, not ‘shoe-in? It’s ‘case in point; not ‘case and point’ It’s ‘moot point, not ‘mute point’ It’s ‘hunger pangs, not ‘hunger pains’ It’s ‘jibe with, not ‘jive with.
    One stands corrected

    Merriam-Webster describes itself as “America’s most trusted dictionary“. It’s also the USA’s oldest dictionary publisher, whose presses first started producing reference books in 1843, according to Wikipedia.

    Your ‘umble scribe hopes the company’s efforts are not in vain, as language skills generally seem to be declining. 🙁

  • Illiteracy or obstinacy?

    Steve WoodsBristol, Language, Politics

    The Tenovus charity shop on St Mark’s Road is currently closed for refurbishment.

    However, this does not seem to have been noticed by the local members of the Hard of Thinking Club, who are continuing to dump their donations outside the shop’s door.

    The operators/owners of the shop have recently decided to post a notice on the shop’s door shutter informing those generous but misguided patrons of the error of their ways.

    Notice reads: If you dump stuff here you are fly-tipping. Please stop. Asked with love and season's greetings from the residents of St Marks.
    Let’s ignore the writing on the wall.

    Just like other notices in Bristol, e.g. the ones that say no parking, Tenovus’ sign has been ignored.

    Is ignoring the notice due to illiteracy or plain, simple bloody-mindedness? Have your say in the comments.

    Meanwhile, if you see fly-tipping, any other environmental crime or something that needs fixing, you can report it to Bristol City Council here, otherwise central government’s GOV.UK site has a handy page to find your local authority in England, Scotland and Wales and notify it of such problems.

  • A message to Donald

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Politics, Social Media

    Your ‘umble scribe is unaware how many times a week – if any – the disgraced former 45th president and current disgraceful 47th president of the United States of America, insurrectionist, convicted felon, adjudicated sexual predator, business fraudster, congenital liar and golf cheat commonly known as Donald John Trump (who is on a mission to Make America Grate Again or something similar. Ed.) catches either a number 77, 87, 196, 452 or N87 from the bus stop at London’s Nine Elms Underground station, but it will do his narcissistic personality disorder no good at all.

    The poster below has this week appeared at the bus stop in response to the USA’s attack on Venezuela and kidnapping of its president, Nicolás Maduro, earlier this week.

    Of course, having the US military at one’s control does mean that The Donald, as commander-in-chief of the US armed forces, is able to call on their members to indulge in the ultimate ‘look over there‘ tactics when required to distract from his embarrassing local difficulties caused by his long-term friendship with the late American financier, human trafficker, child sex offender and serial rapist Jeffrey Epstein, as the thousands of documents known as the Epstein files slowly make their redacted way into the public domain and which he and his sycophantic subordinates seem very reluctant to release, despite the existence and imperative of the Epstein Files Transparency Act, not to mention the Tango Terrorists campaign trail promise to release the files.

    Poster reads No matter how many countries you invade, you'll still be a nonce
    There’s an old adage that says you can tell a man by the company he keeps.

    Before we end, a quick translation from EN-GB for any American readers. You will not find the definition of nonce as used above in a standard American dictionary; you’ll need a British one. It’s British prison slang to denote a person who commits a crime involving sex, especially sex with a child. This definition is taken from the Cambridge online English Dictionary.

    Which country will tRump invade next as a distraction from his next scandal? Have your say in the comments.

  • The seven deadly sins in the tech age

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Social Media, Tech

    According to the Catholic version of Christianity, there are seven deadly sins, i.e. pride, greed, wrath, envy, lust, gluttony, and sloth. Although they are not explicitly listed in the Bible, they developed within early Christian theological tradition. Furthermore, Psychology Today speculates that their origins ‘are nebulous and likely trace back to before Hellenistic Greece‘, even though if offers no source for such an assertion. All evidence of their orin tends to point to the early Christian era and more specifically Evagrius Ponticus, a monk in fourth century Egypt.

    These seven transgressions are also known as cardinal sins, although whether this alternative naming is derived from the sinning scarlet-garbed clergy committing them is not well documented. This naming is likely derived from the other definition of cardinal, i.e. fundamental, of the greatest importance (think the cardinal points of the compass. Ed.).

    Anyway, a new revision of the seven deadly sins has been posted on social media updated for the early 21st century and it bears a distinctly technological character.

    Graphic showing modern tech expressions of the seven deadly sins - Lust by Only Fans, gluttony by Uber Eats, greed by Bitcoin, sloth by Netflix wrath by x/Twitter and envy by Instagram.

    Is this an accurate rendition? Have your say below in the comments.

  • Festive fly-tipping attracts street art

    Steve WoodsBristol, Politics

    Bristol has what could be described as a bit of form when it comes to street art, with the city being the original canvas of the artist known as Banksy.

    Indeed Bristol 247 today has a piece by John Nation, described as the city’s godfather of graffiti outlining why the city continues to be defined by the art form.

    Another form of art for which the city is less recognised is fly-tipping. A couple of days ago, Bristol Live highlighted that almost 200 fly-tipping incidents are reported to the city council every day. Last year the council recorded 10,268 fly-tipping incidents, an increase from 8,556 or over 20% during the previous year.

    The back streets of BS5 have once again provided ample evidence of the combination of street art and fly-tipping over the festive period, with festive fly-tipping attracting the spray can school of art. Look at what your ‘umble scribe found up St Mark’s Grove this morning.

    Mattress spray painted with Merry Christmas and a Christmas tree

    This is not the first time that fly-tipped materials have attracted the spray can crew in that particular street (posts passim).

    In the meantime, if you see fly-tipping, any other environmental crime or something that needs fixing, you can report it to Bristol City Council here, otherwise central government’s GOV.UK site has a handy page to find your local authority in England, Scotland and Wales and report fly-tipping.

  • Bristol annexes seaside town in Cymru

    Steve WoodsBristol, Language, Media

    Bristol ‘Live’, the city’s newspaper of (warped) record, has an unenviable reputation for finding a local Bristolian angle to news stories, whether that be by finding some vaguely connected person who just happens to have a BS postcode or by expanding the city’s boundaries into nearby or more distant local authorities or countries, whether there is any such angle or not.

    A prime example of the latter came to light today concerning the sudden appearance of lots of Victorian footwear on the beach at Aberogwr (otherwise known as Ogmore-by-Sea. Ed.) in Morannwg / Glamorgan.

    How the story was announced and tagged on the paper’s main page is shown below.

    Hundreds of shoes wash up on beach from Victorian shipwreck

    Depending on one’s mode of travel, Bristol is over 100 km from Aberogwr and takes over an hour or even two. There is no way the latter falls within the civic boundaries of the City and County of Bristol, whose closest municipal boundary to Aberogwr extends as far as the low water mark on Ynys Echni / Flat Holm in the middle of the Severn Sea.

    Looking at the facts of the story itself, the founder of the beach clean-up group that removed the shoes said the following:

    “The strongest theory is that the shoes come from a shipwreck called the Frolic, that hit Tusker Rock about 150 years ago. It was carrying shoes and cargo from Italy. They were washed up the Ogmore River and every now and then they appear, especially when there has been erosion of the riverbank.”

    It’s only when one gets to the mention of Tusker Rock (Cymraeg: Ynys Tysgr. Ed.) that the slightness of the connection becomes apparent: it’s a rock in the Bristol Channel 3.2km west of Aberogwr that’s only visible at low tide, but one that has been the end of many vessels over the centuries.

  • Hell redefined

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Politics, Social Media

    Does hell exist?

    Most dictionaries – including Merriam-Webster – provide several definitions, including the following two which describe places that can be either real or imaginary:

    1. a nether world in which the dead continue to exist;
    2. a place or state of misery, torment, or wickedness.

    The second definition may or may not be connected with the first.

    These to have now been joined by a third – the current United States of America – courtesy of social media. Someone known as Vee posted the following on the federated Mastodon network yesterday.

    1am 76 years old. | have lived through the Cuban Missile Crisis, the JFK assassination, the Vietnam War, the Turmoil of 1968, Watergate, the Hostage Crisis, two oil crisis [sic], disco, Reaganomics, 9/11. The covid pandemic....These past 11 months have been easily the most miserable era in America in my lifetime. The hatred, the bigotry, the lies, the racketeering and pedophilia are beyond anything I have ever seen. We are not going to hell as a nation. We are IN hell.
    The burning coals background is a neat touch.

    Yes, you read that correctly, Vee believes hell on earth has been created by the second term regime (not administration. Ed.) of the disgraceful 47th and disgraced 45th president of the United States, insurrectionist, convicted felon, adjudicated sexual predator, business fraudster, congenital liar and golf cheat commonly known as Donald John Trump.

    That is an exhaustive list of calamities that have occurred in the world in the life of your average seventy-something. However, is the perceptive Vee being too hard on disco? Have your say in the comments below.

Posts navigation