The dictionary definition of ambiguity is “the fact of something having more than one possible meaning and therefore possibly causing confusion“.
Any sensible person would therefore believe that ambiguity has no place in a newspaper headline.
However, newspapers are not written nowadays by sensible people: or so it would seem.
This is exacerbated by the modern media practice of trying to cram the entire story into the headline in a condensed form, as shown by the screenshot below of this piece from the Daily Post, a title in the Reach plc stable which serves the north of Cymru.
For the benefit of passing illiterate Reach ‘journalists’, an unambiguous version of the headline would read “Prisoner with smiley face tattoo and links to North Wales on run”.
It has since been rumoured that the smiley face tattoo has been recaptured by police. 😉
The BBC loves to boast about the quality of its journalism.
However, every now and again, it manages to publish an untruth so egregious and also stupid that one wonders how it gained a reputation for high class output in the first place.
To continue our story, we must travel to Nottinghamshire and the banks of the River Trent.
In April members of the police Underwater Search Team found a corroded ship’s bell during a routine training exercise and brought it ashore for a closer look, where the name Humber Prince emerged after the item was cleaned.
The bell was formerly attached to a vessel originally known as the Esso Nottingham, which was built in 1956 and subsequently re-registered as the Humber Prince in 1964 by Hull-based company by John H Whitaker Tankers, which used to ferry hydrocarbons on the river.
From the photos on the police press release, it is obvious that the bell is made of brass or bronze, not a ferrous metal such as iron or steel, which typically rusts as it corrodes.
Wikipedia’s page on the ship’s bell gives full details of the typical materials used.
The bell itself is usually made of brass or bronze, and normally has the ship’s name engraved or cast on it.
May I suggest that the BBC’s author writes out 100 times “Iron and steel rust. Other metals corrode!“
In his 1948 dystopian novel, Nineteen Eighty-Four, George Orwell introduces the concept of Newspeak, a new of language, which is defined as follows, according to Wikipedia.
To meet the ideological requirements of Ingsoc (English Socialism) in Oceania, the Party created Newspeak, which is a controlled language of simplified grammar and limited vocabulary designed to limit a person’s ability for critical thinking. The Newspeak language thus limits the person’s ability to articulate and communicate abstract concepts, such as personal identity, self-expression, and free will, which are thoughtcrimes, acts of personal independence that contradict the ideological orthodoxy of Ingsoc collectivism.
Talking about a limited or non-existent ability for critical thinking, it’s time to introduce Rep. Randy Fine, the Republican Party’s representative for Florida’s 6th congressional district, in whom the capacity for critical thinking is completely lacking, as shown by his social media activity earlier in the week and the following post in particular.
Peaceful bombing, Congressman?
Yes, of course it was peaceful, Randy; there was absolutely no bloodshed and flowers bloomed where the bombs fell.
Rep. Fine’s Wikipedia entry also reveals he is an Islamophobe, racist, gun rights supporter, cheerleader for the genocidal Israeli state (he called Ireland antisemitic for its recognition of Palestine in 2024. Ed.) and, last but not least, homophobic.
Randy Fine reminds your correspondent of another very pertinent quotation from Orwell’s novel, i.e.:
War is peace, freedom is slavery, ignorance is strength.
We all occasionally need help with English grammar, even we pensioners who have spent decades working at linguists, but the above ‘suggestion‘ from Grammarly could be diplomatically described as unhelpful.
According to Wikipedia, “Grammarly is an American English language writing assistant software tool. It reviews the spelling, grammar, and tone of a piece of writing“, as well as being a tool for detecting plagiarism.
On its own website, Grammarly is described as ‘Grammarly, the trusted AI assistant for everyday communication‘.
On the basis of the above howler, your correspondent would not trust it to write out the alphabet in the correct sequence.
Ever since Æthelstan became King of the English in 927 CE, some in England – starting with Æthelstan himself – have had difficulty recognising where England ended and the rest of the world began. Indeed Æthelstan meddled so much in the land of the Scots that they allegedly nicknamed him “The Bastard“.
Given the dominance of England within the Untied Kingdom, this has persisted down through the centuries that separate the present from the days of Ælfred of Wessex‘s grandson.
The latest manifestation of this Englandshire = the entire UK occurs in yesterday’s online edition of Bristol ‘Live’, the city’s unfortunate newspaper of warped record, which managed to defy both demographics and geography in one awful little puff piece masquerading as “news“.
A screenshot of the headline of the offending article is offered below.
Although Wells is described in the piece as “England’s smallest city“, there is no empirical evidence provided of its lack of size. Your ‘umble scribe used a little-known research technique called using a search engine to provide an answer; in this case 5 seconds’ work gave a census population figure of 12,000 for Wells.
However, Wells is not the Untied Kingdom’s smallest cathedral city. Cymru has two cathedral cities that together have a combined population of well under Wells’ 12,000 souls. First of all there’s Llanelwy/St Asaph (pop. 3,485) and Tyddewi/St Davids (pop. 1,751), which is actually the UK’s smallest cathedral city in terms of number of residents.
Your correspondent is surprised that today’s ‘journalists’ are not familiar with this research technique he often uses, which is recommended they use as a matter of course. 😀
As this blog has pointed out previously (posts passim), it is not unusual for bilingual signage to have text that tells the speakers of one language one thing and those of the other language something completely different.
The bad advice given can cover such varied topics as how far one has to travel to legal liability for loss of or damage to private property.
The latter is the subject of a photograph which appeared in your ‘umble scribe’s social media feed this morning and concerns legal liability at an unknown railway station operated by Trafnidiaeth Cymru, also known as Transport for Wales.
In translation, the Welsh text on the sign reads:
You can leave your bike here for free, but at your own risk
On the other hand, the English text reads:
Bicycles may be left here free of charge but at our risk
Judging by the patina on the sign, it’s been there a long time and somebody has yet to take the railway company to court to determine exactly where legal liability lies given the sign’s bilingual ambiguity.
Your correspondent wonders how many of these confusing signs have been installed across Cymru.
Needless to say, some parts of the Welsh media have been having a field day with this elementary orthographical error, with Nation.Cymru jesting as follows:
We can neither confirm or deny that Sports Direct are selling Egnland hats as well!
It looks like the product has now been withdrawn from sale as it does not come up in search results on the company’s website, as confirmed today (4th Dec.) by Nation.Cymru.
Update 02/01/2025:Nation.Cymru reported yesterday that the bobble hat has now reappeared with the correct spelling of Cymru.
The impression is frequently given that these modern times are the era of 24 hour news coverage, but that itself can be very misleading, as can what is and how it is reported.
Whilst it is encouraging to see coverage in the regional press of matters of more than local importance, one has to ask the following question of the Star’s editor: what is this doing under the UK News heading?
When I was a lot younger, I recall being told in school that news of Nelson’s victory at the Battle of Trafalgar in October 1805 took three months to reach settlements in northern Scotland.
It seems that news of the Anglo-Irish Treaty of December 1921 and the subsequent foundation of the Irish Free State in December 1922 has yet to reach Hollinswood Road in Telford where Salopia’s Ministry of Truth is situated.
NB: The paper does have a separate World News section.
Update: 17.00h, 30/11/24: In a textbook case of (lack of) editorial perspicacity, there is now a second Irish election story filed under the UK News heading.
Update: 01/12/24: There seems to be no end to the paper’s political and geographical ignorance as this morning a third story was posted as UK News.
Additional research has since revealed that the Shropshire Star routinely files Irish news under its UK News heading. Neo-colonialism and ignorance are therefore alive and well in the newspaper of record in my home county.
The London to South Wales motorway, otherwise known as the M4, runs from Chiswick in the west of London to Pont Abraham Services near Pontarddulais in Sir Gaerfyrddin (that’s Carmarthenshire for monoglots. Ed.). It passes through or close to the major towns and cities of Slough, Reading, Swindon, Bristol, Casnewydd (Newport), Caerdydd (Cardiff) Pen-y-bont ar Ogwr (Bridgend), Port Talbot and Abertawe (Swansea).
Route of the M4. Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.
Or rather it did: until a traffic report on Sunday in Bristol Live which saw road repairs move it several tens of kilometres south from South Gloucestershire, the unitary authority in which Tormarton is situated to Somerset.
Fact checking is important when reporting the news, except it seems when one works as a Reach plc ‘journalist‘: or the newsroom atlas has inexplicably gone missing; or is non-existent.
Investigating officers have released a picture of a man, who was riding a silver road bike with curved handles, who they would like to identify in connection with the assault. They said it took place on Stapleton Road on Wednesday, August 7.
Curved handles? Since when has a bicycle had handles, let alone curved ones.
At first, your correspondent believed this was just another of Reach plc ‘journalists’ publicly displaying his/her ignorance of the English language, bearing in mind the fact that the correct use of terminology – le mot juste as the French would have it – is vital for comprehension and a lack of confusion on the part of the reader.
The police press office also provided a useful picture of the suspect, plus bicycle complete with those mysterious curved handles.
Those infamous curved handles. Image courtesy of Avon & Somerset Police.
The man pictured is described as white, slim, in his 20s or 30s and has dark hair and facial hair. He is seen wearing a black Adidas hooded top and tracksuit bottoms. He is in possession of a silver road bike with curved handles {sic].
That’s right! Those curved handles actually originated at police headquarters out at Portishead and not in Bristol’s infamous Temple Way Ministry of Truth.
You will have strong oral and written communications skills, an exceptional eye for detail…
The use of the phrase curved handles does show that the author has written communications skills but not strong ones, whilst the lack of an exceptional eye for detail is displayed by an ignorance of the importance of the correct use of terminology.
Words matter, except in Plod’s press room, whilst the ‘journalist’ responsible for copying and pasting the original press release should have been diligent enough to notice the original error and not repeated it, but as a former sub-editor cum media studies lecturer friend pointed out, today’s media studies student (and by implication graduates. Ed.) do not have a very high standard of English.
Finally, hose curved handles are known to most folk outside the police press office and Bristol Live/Post as drop handlebars. 😀
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