social media

  • High gains grifter

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Media, Politics, Social Media

    In the May 2024 general election, the constituency of Clacton returned a member of parliament to the House of Commons, not just an ordinary MP, but a party leader, in this instance one Nigel Paul Farage, head honcho of Reform UK, the latest incarnation of the Farage Fascist Fan Club (see also UKIP and the Brexit Party. Ed.).

    During his days as a member of the European Parliament, Farage was not the most regular attendee in the debating chamber, although he was more than prepared to take the parliament’s generous salary and allowances, even misusing the latter for his own ends rather than those for which they were intended.

    Anyway, enough of past history, let’s come up to the present. Since being elected to the green leather benches, Farage has had difficulty finding the Palace of Westminster to do the job he’s supposed to do for the good burghers of Clacton. Furthermore, he’s also had problems finding Clacton, although his partner has bought a house in the constituency, although the source of the funds for the deal is unsure.

    However, just because he’s happy to take his MP’s salary of nearly £94,000 per year for the work he is expected to do for his electorate and mostly manages to avoid, this does not mean Farage is workshy. Indeed, one glance at his Register of Financial Interests (which runs to two pages. Ed.) reveals the Reform leader is earning over £1m from sources other than the largesse he receives courtesy of the taxpayer.

    This has prompted the Led By Donkeys collective (posts passim) to film a video of his extra-parliamentary earnings and trundle it around the streets of Clacton, as well as its being circulated on social media.

    This latest activity has not escaped the attention of the local media, including the Clacton Gazette, which prefers to refer to Farage’s income declared in the parliamentary register as a claim from Led By Donkeys. This places the Clacton Gazette in clear breach of article 1 – accuracy – of the IPSO guidelines. The Gazette claims (their word. Ed.) to be regulated by IPSO, another of the UK’s regulators, all of whom seem to come with rubber teeth as standard equipment.

    Furthermore, in the comments below the piece most of the constituents of Nigle, as some call their dishonourable member, seem to believe he can do no wrong.

  • Noun becomes terror organisation

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Politics, Social Media

    Antifa or anti-fascist is a noun with the following definitions:

    1. a political movement whose followers are left-wing activists who oppose fascist authoritarianism, capitalism, and extreme right-wing ideologies such as nationalism, xenophobia, and white supremacy; and
    2. a group of such activists, or a member of such a group.

    Opposition to fascism has grown in recent years with the increasing prominence of extreme right wing politics and politicians, particularly in western democracies.

    Not least of these prominent extreme right wing politicians is the disgraced former 45th president and current disgraceful 47th president of the United States of America, insurrectionist, convicted felon, adjudicated sexual predator, business fraudster, congenital liar and golf cheat commonly known as Donald John Trump, who is on a personal mission to Make America Grate Again (or something similar. Ed.).

    The Donald has made no secret in the past of his hatred for those expressing anti-fascist sentiments and standing up to his extreme authoritarian regime; and if you are opposed to anti-fascism, Donny, you know what that makes you, don’t you?

    The Tangerine Tyrant has now gone further than he ever has before, posting the following on Truth Social his social media platform that defies nominative determinism.

    Post reads I am pleased to inform our many U.S.A. Patriots that | am designating ANTIFA, A SICK, DANGEROUS, RADICAL LEFT DISASTER, AS A MAJOR TERRORIST ORGANIZATION. I will also be strongly recommending that those funding ANTIFA be thoroughly investigated in accordance with the highest legal standards and practices. Thank you for your attention to this matter!

    Yes, you read that correctly. A noun is now ‘A MAJOR TERRORIST ORGANIZATION’.

    Just like antifa, organization (to use the US-EN spelling) is a noun. Amongst others, it has the following definition.

    A group of persons organized for some end or work; association.

    As is usual when The Donald starts throwing his weight about on social media, there has been some criticism, particularly from those with expertise in terrorism, not to say outright ridicule, but more on the latter presently.

    The most clear criticism your ‘umble scribe has seen has emanated from ex-US Navy man Malcolm Nance who replied to Trump’s invective as shown below.

    Post reads - TERRORISM EXPERT HERE: You cannot designate an idea as a terrorist group. There is no organization called ANTIFA. There is no leadership or funding path. There is no membership. Also there is no law in American to charge terrorism. Ask Luigi. What he is doing is setting the stage to designate ANY American as a terrorist. That's Fascism.

    As regards the mockery of Trump’s flawed logic, untold numbers of social media users have posted about members of their families who have been involved in anti-fascist actions.

    Your correspondent also posted a photograph of a prominent anti-fascist activist from 1942.

    Major-General Dwight D. Eisenhower photographed in 1942.
    Image courtesy of Wikimedia Commons.

    Those of us with long memories have not forgotten the last time Uncle Sam displayed noun-based hostility. In 2011, the war on terror was declared by then President George W. Bush and resulted in such horrors as the Guantanamo Bay detention camp (which has yet to close. Ed.) and so-called extraordinary rendition, i.e. the state-sponsored abduction of people in a foreign jurisdiction and transfer to a third country, usually for interrogation linked to the use of torture.

    Taking all the above into account, one has to credit Trump with one thing: he’s doing a great job of making America grate.

    Don Quixote tilting at windmills as depicted by Gustav Doré. Image courtesy of Wikimedia CommonsUpdate 23/09/2025: It was announced overnight that Trump has issued an executive order designating the aforementioned noun as a domestic terror organisation. In the text of the executive order, a common Trump playbook tactic is apparent – accusing one’s opponents of exactly the kinds of actions – e.g. doxing and physical assault – his MAGA louts have been inflicting on their perceived opponents for years. Anyway, the very best of luck on your witch hunt against a noun and an idea, Donny! Your action is reminiscent of another Don and his epic quest against windmills* in La Mancha.

    * = The Donald also has a well-documented hatred of of a particular kind of windmill known as a wind turbine.

  • Hotels and roundabouts

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Oddities, Social Media

    Commenting on the present intimidatory actions of the far right out in the streets, this still from a well-known scene in Monty Python and the Holy Grail currently doing the rounds on social media has been given the meme treatment.

    John Cleese on the battlements in the centre of two block of text. 1) Your mother paints roundabouts. 2) And your father shouts at hotels.

    No further comment is required apart from saying that in the film, Clees and his companions within the castle were all playing forrins, insulting and humiliating Arthur and his knights of the round table.

  • Gourmet baked goods

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Oddities, Social Media

    The story of baked pastry dough wrapped around is tasty filling is a long one. Sometime before 2000 BCE, a recipe for chicken pie was written on a tablet in Sumer – the earliest known civilisation – in southern Mesopotamia (now south-central Iraq. Ed.), according to Wikipedia.

    Moving forward a couple of millennia, the 1st century Roman cookbook Apicius includes several recipes involving a pie case.

    It would therefore seem evident humans have been munching pastry baked around a filling for at least two millennia.

    Coming right up to date, one of today’s largest producers of baked goods in the Untied Kingdom is Greggs, founded in the Gosforth area of Newcastle upon Tyne in 1939. From the 1970s onwards, Greggs embarked on a string of acquisitions and mergers. In June 2025 the chain had 2,649 outlets and also employs over 33,000 staff. Some items are only sold in particular regions, whilst the company also sells some of its products (e.g. bakes, melts and pasties) through the Iceland supermarket chain.

    As a mass market supplier, Greggs is frequently mocked for being down-market and this brings us neatly to humour and punning, a social media staple.

    Post reads 'What’s the matter babe? You've not even touched your Gregg’s Benedict.'

    Greggs Benedict?

    Sounds delicious!

    However, there was once – but no longer – an actual Greggs Benedict available under a fine dining ‘experience’:

    For breakfast and brunch, don’t miss out on the “Greggs Benedict” – the Greggs Sausage, Bean and Cheese Melt reimagined with smoked ham, poached Cacklebean eggs and a velvety Hollandaise sauce. Our ‘Full English’ celebrates the icon that is the Greggs Sausage Roll alongside bacon, mushroom, tomato, baked beans and a choice of eggs – scrambled, poached or fried. The dish also comes as a vegetarian and vegan option.

    Bon appétit !

  • Making America Grater Again

    Steve WoodsPolitics, Social Media

    In political science lectures many decades ago, one of the myriad facts we students absorbed was that authoritarian and totalitarian regimes in the 20th century had a tendency to rewrite history along the lines of the Ministry of Truth in George Orwell‘s dystopian novel Nineteen Eight-Four.

    Whilst it may be argued that all nation states include total fabrications and distortions in their national fairy stories (e.g. the fictional King Arthur in English/British history. Ed.), some are more accomplished than others in their incorporation of lies and events that never occurred, some are more prone to this practice than others; and the United States is a past master of telling itself fibs. Some of the US of A’s biggest lies were examined in a three part documentary series by historian Lucy Worsley in 2019.

    Indeed, one might say that the American national story is dominated more by the lies it contains than by the ugly truths of the course of American history if it chooses to omit, such as the genocide and dispossession of the indigenous inhabitants and the cruelty and exploitation inherent in chattel slavery and the plantation system.

    Having spoken extensively above of American lies, it’s time to move to Washington, DC and the presently blinged-up man cave otherwise known as the Oval Office, currently occupied by the country’s Liar-in-Chief, the disgraced former 45th president and current disgraceful 47th president of the United States of America, insurrectionist, convicted felon, adjudicated sexual predator, business fraudster, congenital liar and golf cheat commonly known as Donald John Trump, who is on a personal mission to Make America Grate Again (or something similar. Ed.).

    The Donald has taken to his Truth Social* social media echo chamber earlier this week railing that museums and universities were not telling ‘proper’ US history and were too “WOKE” [sic]. He wrote the following.

    Post reads The Museums throughout Washington, but all over the Country are, essentially, the last remaining segment of “WOKE.” The Smithsonian is OUT OF CONTROL, where everything discussed is how horrible our Country is, how bad Slavery was, and how unaccomplished the downtrodden have been — Nothing about Success, nothing about Brightness, nothing about the Future. We are not going to allow this to happen, and | have instructed my attorneys to go through the Museums, and start the exact same process that has been done with Colleges and Universities where tremendous progress has been made. This Country cannot be WOKE, because WOKE IS BROKE. We have the “HOTTEST” Country in the World, and we want people to talk about it, including in our Museums.

    As regards one of Tangerine Insurrectionist’s targets, the Smithsonian’s National Museum of American History, this was on the receiving end of his ire for having the temerity, much to Trump’s wounded pride, of mentioning his two impeachments in his first term of (subsequently removed. Ed.) from its exhibit on The Limits of Presidential Power.

    What Trump’s social media post merely indicates he wants bully US institutions into doing in order to pander to his own exceedingly vain, distorted, white, racist, privileged world view. This line of action has a name: historical revisionism, something to which the now defunct Soviet Union was prone during its existence from 1922–1991 (e.g. prominent but out-of-favour individuals being deliberately edited out of photographs and the remainder of the official record).

    Wikipedia defines the phenomenon as follows:

    Historical revisionism is the reinterpretation of a historical account. It involves challenging the orthodox (established, accepted or traditional) scholarly views or narratives regarding a historical event, timespan, or phenomenon by introducing contrary evidence or reinterpreting the motivations of the people involved. Revision of the historical record can reflect new discoveries of fact, evidence, and interpretation as they come to light. The process of historical revision is a common, necessary, and usually uncontroversial process which develops and refines the historical record to make it more complete and accurate.

    One form of historical revisionism involves denying the moral significance or accuracy of the historical record. This type of historical revisionism is called historical negationism, and is contentious as it often includes denying the veracity of genuine documents, or deliberately manipulating statistical data to reach predetermined conclusions. The destruction or alteration of cultural heritage sites is also considered a form of illegitimate historical revisionism when it serves to deny the cultural or historical claims of ethnic groups.

    Trump’s social media post shows all the hallmarks of historical revisionism, but at the same time, he seems determined to make America safe again for ignorant, racist, insecure, selfish and entitled old white men like himself.

    Note in particular the word again. Trump is harking after an imagined lost past. As for museums and the future, The Donald doesn’t realise that museums serve to collect, preserve, interpret, and display objects of cultural, historical, or scientific significance. Their primary functions include safeguarding heritage for future generations and facilitating education. If the future is involved, the role of museums and the like should be educating people about the mistakes of history, not airbrushing or erasing them.

    * = No irony was intended in the naming of the platform. Ed.

  • Gemsbok

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Social Media, Tech

    One neoligism (posh for new word. Ed.) that has become prominent in recent times is doomscrolling, defined as the activity of spending a lot of time looking at your phone or computer and reading bad or negative news stories.

    This can naturally be extremely depressing, hence the tendency of folk to seek comfort in online content not concerned with people’s inhumanity to their fellows to alleviate the feelings of despair, be this fluffy cat and dog photos, even fluffier photos of sheep (yes, I’m looking at you, Mastodon! Ed.). These are joined by wildlife and avian photography.

    One of the sources of wildlife images that turns up in your ‘umble scribe’s timeline comes courtesy of Namibia Weather. This features a live webcam at a waterhole in the Gondwana Namib Park, which claims to be Namibia’s first live webcam and regularly posts stills from the feed on Mastodon.

    Waterhole in the Namib Desert with drinking wildebeest

    The wildlife varies by the minute if you watch the live Youtube feed. Besides wildebeest, other large mammals that regularly visit the waterhole are South African oryx, otherwise known as gemsbok Note the striking monochrome facial markings.

    Gemsbok at the watering hole

    Sometimes cats, dogs or even sheep are just not a good enough antidote… Happy browsing! 😀

  • WECA and the cult of personality

    Steve WoodsBristol, Politics, Social Media

    The West of England Combined Authority – usually abbreviated to WECA – was established in February 2017 and covers the local authorities of Bristol City Council, Bath & NE Somerset and South Gloucestershire. The decision to establish WECA – after being proposed by central government – was one taken by the local authorities involved. There was neither consultation of the residents concerned, nor a referendum of the relevant electorates to seek their approval. Your ‘umble scribe therefore regards its democratic legitimacy as dubious.

    The first election for the mayor of the new authority was held on 4th May 2017. It was won by South Gloucestershire Conservative politician Tim Bowles, a man who shunned publicity so much he was known by some in local social media circles as Invisible Tim.

    The invisibility of the WECA mayor all changed when the next incumbent arrived in 2021, Labour’s Dan Norris. Norris so craved publicity he made great efforts to get his name in the media and in the public’s head so much that his efforts bordered on the narcissistic, leading your correspondent to refer to Norris in social media posts as Dan, Dan the Vanity Man. Indeed, it could be said that Norris would have attended the opening of an envelope if a press photographer was present to record the event.

    Norris was renowned for two acts of self-promotion during his term of office, both involving buses. Firstly, his name appeared on posters on every bus stop in the WECA area, but more on that topic later. Secondly, not content with getting his name of every bus stop in the district, Norris decided he ought to be on the side of a bus as well, purporting to promote driving a bus for a living and advertise a free bus travel scheme, but actually a chance to get likenesses of a vain man and his dog on the side of a double-decker. WECA spent £10,000 on this sycophantic stunt that was ultimately ruled to have been spent ‘unlawfully’.

    Image of the Norris' unlawful bus wrap

    Norris’ term as WECA mayor ended in disgrace. He became an MP and was for the last part of his term of office Dan ‘Two Jobs’ Norris. In April 2025 Dan, Dan the Vanity Man was arrested by Avon and Somerset Police on suspicion of rape, child sex offences, child abduction and misconduct in public office.

    Continuity vanity

    In May Norris’ term of office ended. His replacement is Helen Godwin, who has been involved in local politics since 2016, according to her Wikipedia entry.

    However, very little has changed with the change of incumbent. There’s still a free bus travel scheme (but for children of school age. Ed.) and the bus stop posters now feature Godwin’s name instead of her predecessor’s.

    WECA bus stop poster advertising free summer bus travel for children
    Close-up of bottom-right corner of poster which bears the wording West England [sic] Helen Godwin Mayor of the west of England

    One might believe on the strength of the above evidence that something is seriously amiss in the West of England Combined Authority. For the last four years and for the foreseeable future, the authority seems to be in the grip of what is normally referred to as the cult of personality.

    Wikipedia defines the cult of personality as follows:

    A cult of personality, or a cult of the leader, is the result of an effort which is made to create an idealized and heroic image of an admirable leader, often through unquestioning flattery and praise. Historically, it has been developed through techniques such as the manipulation of the mass media, the dissemination of propaganda, the staging of spectacles, the manipulation of the arts, the instilling of patriotism, and government-organized demonstrations and rallies.

    In addition to obvious examples like Adolf Hitler, Joseph Stalin and Argentina’s Juan Peron, the cult of personality has over the centuries affected countries spanning the entire alphabet from Albania to Zimbabwe. It is currently flourishing in the United States where his MAGA lout supporters think Donald John Trump, the disgraced former 45th president and current disgraceful 47th president of the United States of America, insurrectionist in chief, convicted felon, adjudicated sexual predator, business fraudster, congenital liar and golf cheat, can do no wrong.

    In 1988 the US band Living Colour released a single, The Cult of Personality off their debut album Vivid. Taling about the single, band member Vernon Reid stated; “The whole idea was to move past the duality of: That’s a good person and that’s a bad person. What do the good and the bad have in common? Is there something that unites Gandhi and Mussolini? Why are they who they are? And part of it is charisma.“. Reid also remarked: “‘Cult of Personality’ was about celebrity, but on a political level. It asked what made us follow these individuals who were larger than life yet still human beings.“

  • Public health information

    Steve WoodsOddities, Politics, Social Media

    From your ‘umble scribe’s social media timeline this morning.

    Outside St Thomas’ Hospital in central London at the other end of Westminster Bridge from Halitosis Hall.

    Spoof NHS poster at bus stop entitled know your parasites featuring ticks, worms and billionaires and their treatment.

    One wonders why governments around the world are not at all keen in eradicating the scourge of the ultra-rich, whom the planet can ill afford to accommodate. Just look at the emissions from their private jets, let alone the dubious company they keep (e.g. the inauguration of the disgraced former 45th president and current disgraceful 47th president of the United States of America, insurrectionist, convicted felon, adjudicated sexual predator, business fraudster, congenital liar and golf cheat commonly known as Donald John Trump) and their attempts to buy elections.

    One can only hope that any passing politicians will absorb and act on this valuable health advice.

  • Hashtag in the wild

    Steve WoodsBristol, Politics, Social Media

    More years ago than he cares to remember, your ‘umble scribe was asked by one of his local ward councillors (now retired) to come up with a hashtag to publicise our fight against grime – litter, fly-tipping. fly-posting and other environmental crimes – in Bristol’s inner city wards of Easton and Lawrence Hill.

    And so #TidyBS5 was born.

    Well over a decade later, it’s very encouraging to see others using it, as per this mattress currently gracing St Mark’s Grove.

    Mattress with the wording Tracey Emin #TidyBS5

    However, the BS5 article is not to be confused with the artwork My Bed by Ms Emin, as shown below.

    My Bed by Tracy Emin

    In the meantime, BS5ers are encouraged to report the environmental crimes listed above via the Bristol City Council website.

  • Suspicious…

    Steve WoodsLanguage, Politics, Social Media

    From your ‘umble scribe’s bigly (© convicted felon, adjudicated sexual predator and golf cheat Donald John Trump, who is on a mission to Make America Grate Again – or something similar. Ed.) social media timeline.

    No further comment is required. However, if you feel like commenting, please scroll to the end of this post. 😀

    BREAKING NEWS - The FBI intercepted a suspicious package addressed to Trump. They determined it contained a dictionary and a copy of the U.S. Constitution.
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